5 tips on: How to ask Her Dad.

     Now we here at the Guide to Life for Dummies know many of you gentlemen have been wanted some helpful tips on this important aspect of life.
Thinking it over, we came up with these 5 very helpful tips on getting her dad's permission to marry her....

  #1. This is a little after the fact, but after you ask him for his permission, it's great to quote a Bible verse, especially if he looks surprised, doubtful, and doesn't say anything for more than 1 second.
     A good example would be John 13:27, ".... Then said Jesus unto him, That thou doest, do quickly."
This will help him make up his mind a lot quicker, hopefully in your favor.
 
  #2. Tell him you don't have a job. If he knows you have a job, tell him you got fired. This is to make him think you don't have one, so later, he'll have a pleasant surprise. People always like pleasant surprises. If you tell him you have a job, it wouldn't create as much favor as if you tell him later.

  #3. Bring flowers. Yes siree, then throw them down in front of him, grind those petals into the floor, and tell him that's what will happen to your life if he doesn't agree.

   #4.  Most guys are extremely egocentric and "me-centered" and will claim "I'll take care of her for the rest of her life. I'll provide for her, and I'll be there for her..." There is a BIG problem with that.
It's never good to keep on saying I, I, I in a conversation, especially one this important. Not only does this sound selfish and egocentric, but your potential father-in-law is going to think you're Donald Trump.
   Instead, tell him that Social Security will take care of his daughter for the rest of her life. He'll associate something as big and strong as the government with the well-being of his daughter, and will feel confident in her future.

  #5. Back to the second tip: if the surprise/no-job approach turns sour, slap your knee, let out laugh, and tell him it was just a joke, and that you're quite rich: in fact you made thousands playing Texas Hold-em in Vegas. And you just won the lottery and reinvested in more lottery tickets, so his daughter will be provided for. Just wait till you can teach those poker techniques to his grand-kids.
    He'll be so proud.

-Me.